He told me he is in love with me. 8-28-2017

3:47 PM

¡Hola Familia!

Fue una semana pesada con muchas lágrimas. I am not going to lie, this week was a super hard week for me. There was just one thing after another and y'all might want to hold on to your seats for this week because it was a crazy one!

So first thing you all should know. We got a call Monday evening from the APs telling us we were having an emergency transfer. One of the Hermanas in Lexington Sur went home and so Hermana Espinoza and I got transferred to Lexington Sur with Hermana Banks. First of all it's a party being in a trio, I don't think I've ever laughed so hard in my life and the work is just a lot easier with one extra person, I love it. So we are living in Lexington now in our own apartment but we still cover all the Spanish areas. We've had a lot of Spanish speaking missionaries go home early so right now we are covering four Spanish areas which is like eight English areas, it's a little crazy. We moved in on Thursday and I'm still debating whether or not I want to unpack my things!

Vicente... 😭😭😭 we didn't have his baptism yesterday. During the week we had a lesson with him and we were practicing the baptismal interview and in the middle of it he told me he is in love with me. Honestly, we weren't expecting it at all. It broke my heart. We explained to him that as missionaries we don't have relationships with people on the mission. We dropped his baptismal date because we want him to get baptized for the right reason. So the missionaries will pick him back up after I go home and make sure it happens the right way.

We found a solid investigator last Monday, his name is Sergio. He is a former investigator that Hermana Espinoza knows really well. When we went to visit him he was super excited and accepted a baptismal date for September 10, he told us he is still living all of the commandments and wants to be baptized. Well the week went by and after we moved to Lexington we had another lesson with him and he basically said he has too many doubts and we found out he has a pretty bad addiction. The lesson was super draining, emotionally and spiritually. I think he will be baptized, not on September 10 and probably not any time soon, but he will be baptized.

So there's the Duarte family. The missionaries have been teaching them for two years and they had a baptismal date for September 3. We went over on Thursday for a lesson with them and at first I thought it was going really well but then they told us they found some unfavorable material and they cannot and will not have a testimony in Joseph Smith or the Book of Mormon. They told us there's no way they were getting baptized on September 3.

I was so sad that day. I felt like all of the people that were so solid and were for sure getting baptized slipped right through our hands. I felt like it had to be my fault, I was bad luck! The rest of the week was super hard as well, so many people were so mean to us, even some of our own members. All of our investigators were falling away, and we had so much stress of taking care of so many people in such a big area. My Spanish was horrible this week, I felt like I couldn't say anything I wanted to and people made sure to let me know I couldn't speak Spanish. I missed Frankfort and Versailles and was so sad to leave it with just a few weeks left and to be honest there were a few nights that Hermana Espinoza and I just sat together and cried haha!

But there was one night I started feeling sorry for myself but then Dad rescued me. It was after the Duarte's lesson and like I said I was just feeling sorry for myself. When we got in for the night I got on my knees and asked Heavenly Father for help to get rid of these feelings and just asking Him why it was so hard this week. Dad wrote me an email and told me to read the talk "Foundations of Faith" and so I did and it turned my week around. There were two scriptures in the talk and the spirit taught me a lot. It said:

"If the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son (daughter), that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good. The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?”

My thoughts were quickly turned to the Savior. He went through what no person has ever had to go through, He descended below us all. He felt more pain and heart ache than I could ever imagine. But yet He never complained. He never felt sorry for Himself. He continued to turn outwards. And I needed to do the same.

Missions are hard. This is the hardest thing I've ever done but it's supposed to be hard. It wasn't easy for the Savior, and it won't be easy for us either. "Salvation really is not a cheap experience." This week was a wonderful opportunity for me to take my own advice (be happy) and to apply the Atonement of Jesus Christ in my own life. As I continued to study the conference talks I read:

"Through His life, suffering, death, and Resurrection, He removed every impediment to our rejoicing and finding peace on this earth."

I have no excuse not to be happy because I have the Atonement. The Savior removed every impediment and as I relied on Him this week it was incredible to see my attitude change as I looked to the Savior instead of myself.

And throughout the craziness of this week there was so much laughter and so much fun. Hermana Espinoza and Hermana Banks are incredible and are two of my best friends. It might be a bad idea to have the three of us together because we can't stop laughing. And even though it felt like the world was falling apart a little bit this week it was so easy to see God's kindness every single day.

We had interviews with President Hughes and interviews are always so uplifting, Sister Hurt from Shelbyville came to Frankfort and it was such a blessing to see her! Sister Goodspeed was feeling better this week, we had a great turnout at fútbol, and we had 10 investigators at church yesterday and 2 less actives. And last night as I was talking to Heavenly Father I poured out my heart and had some questions for Him. This morning when I woke up I had three emails from people I haven't heard from in a while and every single email answered one of the questions from my prayer last night. It's incredible how aware God is and how He is always so merciful and always giving. I am so grateful for Him and my Savior. They saved me once again this week.

I'm sorry for being a little negative this week but I hope you all know I love my mission so much. I love this work and I am happy. And I have good news!! Swiss Days this week!!!!! Have so much fun and know I'm always praying for y'all! I love you all and be happy, because life is too short to be anything else.

Con amor,

Hermana Swapp

PS: "But if ye will turn to the Lord with full purpose of heart, and put your trust in him, and serve him with all diligence of mind, if ye do this, he will, according to his own will and pleasure, deliver you out of bondage." -Mosiah 7:33